Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

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I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I actually pay taxes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

United-JetBlue Tie Up Leaves American Airlines Bloodied - Live and Let's Fly

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

How could Trump, with his deplorable garbage supporters, manage to win an election?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

What would happen if Kakashi and Naruto switched places?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Why do some people believe that Homelander would be no match for Superman or Thor?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I see through liars

Jac Caglianone and a modern history of left handed sluggers - Royals Review

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t buy bullshit

Vandals target Paris Holocaust memorial, synagogues with paint - France 24

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

You guys are talking about having sex with dogs. I heard a news man was trying to have sex with a female dog and got stuck inside. Is that possible? How does it feel inside a dog’s vagina?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know who the president of Turkey really is

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A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand how hurricane paths work

What is the American mobile phone number format?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Emotional David Andrews says he didn’t want to play for any team other than the Patriots - NBC Sports

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I can count

Why do so many people suddenly think it's acceptable to continue to live with their parents into adulthood?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I can read

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I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have a reading level above third grade

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity